NY Sports Dog: Mad Scientists Create Santos

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mad Scientists Create Santos

After some thorough research we've discovered where Omir Santos came from.

Apparently, he is the result of a cloning experiment first envisioned by Frank Cashen, implemented by Bobby Valentine, then tweaked by Rick Peterson, and finally perfected by none other than Tom Seaver, whose "vineyards" are actually an ultra-classified breeding ground that the Hall of Famer has been running for over a decade.

First, they took some DNA from Paul LoDuca and Carlos Beltran, then combined them. After the embryo was successfully developed, Gary Carter and Keith Hernandez began teaching Santos how to play like a Met.

The results, to date, have been stunning.

Santos has a compact swing, solid catching skills, the perfect blend of fire and cool and looks equally like his "Dads".

Seaver is currently working on a lefthanded starting pitcher.

Omir Santos 2009 Season Stats
SPLITSGABRH2B3BHRRBIBBSOSBCSAVGOBPSLGOPS
Season164081231181900.300.310.500.810
Career264671131161900.239.250.413.663
Last 77112320021200.273.308.455.762
Projected1483707411128997498300.300.310.500.810

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9 comments:

Dylan said...

Haha! This is fantastic.

Dave Singer said...

LOL...thanks...doesn't he look and play like a mix of those guys?

kranepool society said...

You're mad Singer Mad I tell you

The possibilities here are endless

Anonymous said...

That is funny as hell.

NYsportsGUY said...

I have a MANCRUSH ON OMIR TOO!!!

Dylan said...

What do you think they will do when Schneider gets back?

Dave Singer said...

Tough question...I personally think Castro is done when Schneider gets back, but you never know.

Shrek is so damn fragile, and the team COULD go with one less arm in the pen.

Anonymous said...

Thumbs up!

Anonymous said...

Tough call for the Mets - what no hit medicore defensive catcher should they go with?

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