My Plan to Take Over Citizen's Bank Park

Yes my friends, I am pulling out ALL the stops this year to ensure Met domination of the NL East.

Step 1: Take over Citizen's Bank Park

"How?" you ask.

Simple my amigos, I am going to work there as a "Phanstormer".

I call this project "Code Name Foli".

A Phanstormer is a energetic person who goes around trying to make the game experience more enjoyable for Philly fans.

Here is the job description:

Phanstormers - Philadelphia Phillies (Philadelphia, PA)

The Philadelphia Phillies are hiring energetic, versatile performers to join the 2010 Phanstormers. Phanstormers entertain the crowds at Citizens Bank Park before and during Phillies' home games. They welcome fans to the ballpark, perform Happy Birthdays and participate in prize giveaways. Phillies are looking for outgoing, friendly individuals to join the crew - improvisers, comedians, jugglers, magicians, musicians, etc. A love for baseball is a plus but not a necessity.

Auditions and interviews will be held on Sunday, February 28th from 6:00 to 10:00 p.m. at Citizens Bank Park BY APPOINTMENT ONLY. Please call Chris Long, Director of Entertainment at (215-218-5219) for more information and to schedule an audition.

Please come prepared to have fun and to showcase any special skills & talent. This a non-union, paid position.

Apply for this position

After I'm hired, the plan is to lay in wait until the first time the Mets invade Citizen Bank Park, and then put my evil plan in place.

During the 7th inning stretch, I will unleash my Mr Met t-shirt, get on top of the Philly dugout, and set a Philly Phanatic doll on fire while mooning Chase Utley and singing Meet the Mets.

Who among you has the courage to join me?

I would appreciate if one of you were at least ready with bail money.

Domo Arigato Mr. Hisanori Takahashi

Lots of reports out there that the Mets are on the cusp of signing Hisanori Takahashi to a minor league contract.

From the NY Times:
The Dodgers, Orioles, Red Sox and Padres also offered minor league contracts, but the Mets made the strongest offer. According to the report, Takahashi would make roughly $1 million if he cracks the major league team, with a chance for an additional $500,000 in performance incentives. Takahashi, who turns 35 in April, posted a 3.70 ERA over 10 seasons with the Yomiuri Giants. The veteran southpaw was a starting pitcher in Japan, but has been projected by many as a reliever in the United States. If that holds true, he would have a chance to be the second left-hander out of the bullpen behind Pedro Feliciano in New York.

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20 Years of Yankee and Mets Payrolls

I was having a discussion with my brother, a devout Yankee fan, and and we were comparing the relatives success, or lack of success, for each team, as well as their strategy for building the ballclubs.

He rightfully argues the Yankees have more homegrown talent, and I rightfully argued that the Yankees have also infused the homegrown guys with a continual cast of very high-priced free agents.

When the payroll discussion inevitably arouse, my brother was a bit in denial about the Yankees spending habits. He argued that the Mets "used to way outspend the Yankees," and that it was only recently that the Yankees spent a ton, but that they were bringing the payroll "way, way down" the last few years.

My brother, like many Yankee fans, is delusional. To prove this, I created a quick chart depicting both team's payrolls over the last 20 years.

Overall the Yankees have outspent the Mets by about $600M during that time, with the majority of the spending difference occurring in the last 7 years.

While the Mets have certainly spent a lot, they also have not had the same success as the Yankees.

We all cringe at 2009, but the Mets spending was pretty high overall during the 2006-2008 years--years in which the team had a lot of success, albeit some major disappointment as well. That said, they were, for lack of a better term, "on the cusp."

The payroll for 2010 will be in the $125M range, and that is part and parcel of the team's financial woes and the weak free agent market for 2010.

The numbers:

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VIDEO: Willie Mays on the Daily Show

Say hey!

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Willie Mays
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Crisis

Want to be a Major League Mascot?

Well, you can...the Kansas City Royals are looking....for you!

And by the looks of it, there are some fringe benefit possibilities.

Sorry, there are no openings for Mr Met.

Mascot - Kansas City Royals (Kansas City, MO)

MASCOT
(Full Time)

JOB SUMMARY:
Assist Sr. Director of Event Presentation & Production to ensure that all elements of the Mascot Program are implemented correctly and follow the company’s values. Mascot Program includes all appearances, game operation duties and general administration as well as training alternate & assistants involved with the Mascot Program.

RESPONSIBILITIES:
• Responsible for performing at two hundred (200) appearances throughout the fiscal year (November 1- October 31)
• Work with Sr. Director to ensure that the Alternate Mascot is correctly and thoroughly trained in a manner consistent with the character and has been given the tools with which to perform to their fullest extent
• Participate in league initiatives (i.e. All-Star) or any other appearances as deemed necessary by the Sr. Director.
• Perform as Sluggerrr at all Royals home games (81)
• Work with Sr. Director to create, develop and implement mascot skits performed at Royals games
• Work with Mascot Appearance Coordinator to ensure that all props, signs etc. are kept up in a manner suitable for showing at games and appearances
• Maintain office hours as scheduled by Sr. Director. Use office hours to work on developing the character’s craft (props, shooting drills, skits/video features etc.)
• Attend weekly EPP staff meetings and any other meeting as requested by Mascot Appearance Coordinator &/or Sr. Director
• Assist in any additional duties assigned by the Mascot Appearance Coordinator &/or Sr. Director

REQUIREMENTS:
• Must be at least 18 years old
• Must be at least a high school graduate (college degree preferred)
• Must have at least two years experience as a mascot at the college or professional level
• Must be a creative performer
• Must possess a basic knowledge of Major League Baseball
• Ability to support & grow the Mascot Character/Program
• Must be 6’-6’4” tall in order to fit costume properly
• Must provide a DVD or link to view a video highlight & photo while performing

EOE

Note: When you apply for this job online, you will be required to answer the following questions:

1. Are you at least 18 years old?
2. Do you have at least 2 years experience as a mascot at the college or professional level?
3. Are you at least 6’ tall?
4. Can you provide a DVD or link to view a video highlight & photo of your performances?

Apply for this position | Go back job listings

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Can We Platoon the 2008 Jacobs and the 2008 Tatis?

As my readers know, I am not a fan of Daniel Murphy and would really like to see him go back and play parts of second base, first base, and a little third base for an entire year in AA. His future is as a Ty Wigginton type player, not as a big league first baseman.

As you can see here, Wigginton has had a decent career by virtue of his versatility and ability to hit a little while playing multiple positions.

With Mike Jacobs coming in as a non-roster invite, there is a chance for the Mets to have some production at first base way over and above the 95 OPS+ that Daniel Murphy provided last year.

So for our purposes here today, let's remove 2009 forever from our minds....have you done it yet...I'll wait a bit longer. OK, there it is...we are back to the very end of 2008 and we're about to platoon Fernando Tatis with Mike Jacobs as the first baseman for the Mets.

Let's look at their numbers:

Mike Jacobs:

Split        AB  H 2B 3B HR RBI SB CS BB SO   BA  OBP  SLG  OPS
vs RHP      358 92 23  2 25  70  1  0 31 83 .257 .315 .542 .857 

Fernando Tatis:

Split        AB  H 2B 3B HR RBI SB CS BB SO   BA  OBP  SLG  OPS
vs LHP      106 33  8  0  1  19  0  0 14 20 .311 .393 .415 .809 

Now that would be a decent combination, not great, but more production and power than Murphy will provide.

Finally, I still have to ask why Murphy is not working on becoming a second baseman, or at least a more seasoned utility player? He has no future in the big leagues as a first baseman, and with Ike Davis in the wings for 2011, Murphy has no real future with the Mets unless he can play another position, most likely second base.

Murphy did play 17 games at second in 2008 in AA, but no games since. He has also worked at 3B, in the outfield, and is now penciled in as the Mets first baseman for 2010.

It makes little sense to me.

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Five Rules on How to Not Sound Pathetic in 2010

It's been tough reading some of the crap being spewed about the Mets over these past few months, but there is a point when you can stop and smell the roses, or in this case the fresh green grass of spring training.

We've reached that point, so from here forward, try to obey these basic rules as we gear up for the season, or I will go positively Tim Foli on your ass!

• Rule #1: When the Mets claim a minor leaguer you don't know much about, don't say, "oh great, another stupid move". At least try to realize small moves get made for a variety of reasons, and there is a business being run.
  
• Rule #2: Every big name free agent was not destined be a Met, just like they weren't all destined to be a Yankee, Philly, Twin, or Blue Jay.
• Rule #3: Quitting on your team and shouting it on every message board before the season starts is boorish behavior.
• Rule #4: You used to enjoy baseball, then 2009 happened, we understand. We also understand you should effing get over it already.
• Rule #5: It's OK to complain, it's not OK to complain about everything....we will make an exception to allow you to complain about this post...then you can please shut up.
  

An Outstanding Mets Fan Video for 2010

Kudos to Steve Sidoti for creating this video. The music is phenomenal and his choice of content is exemplary.

I know that hope truly does spring eternal, and this video is the epitome of that.

Well done! Let's play two!

You Want to Work for the Mets? Here's How...

An update to my post from yesterday on jobs with the Mets.

The Mets are currently looking to fill the following positions: Photographers, Pepsi Party Patrol and FanFest Staff. There are also internships for you enterprising young college students.

Internet/New Media: Photography

NEW YORK METS FAN PHOTOS STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS - New York Mets (New York, NY)

Where: Citi Field, Flushing NY
When: New York Mets home games: April 5th – October 3rd, 2010
Salary: $10.00/hr with bonus opportunities

Amazin’ Fan Photo staff photographers take photos of fans during games and events, which are then made available via mets.com for purchase.

Games-There are 12-15 photographers working every Mets home game. You are not required to work every game but we do request that you are available to work 75% of games during each homestand (to clarify, a homestand is the number of games played at home, back to back, and can range between 6 and 10 games). Each photographer has a specific section of the park during pre-game and in-game. We require our photographers to be here 2 hours prior to game time to shoot the pre-game crowds. We usually shoot until the 7th inning, after which you are free to watch the rest of the game in the standing room only sections. Shifts are approximately 3.5-5 hours long and you are on your feet moving around the stadium and interacting with fans the entire time.

General-We provide shirts and all digital SLR camera equipment. All you need is to bring is yourself and an outgoing, positive attitude. Although we do not require previous photography experience, it is preferred along with an interest in the field of photography. We are looking for enthusiastic, reliable, social people who have basic camera knowledge.

If this seems like a good fit for you please apply online. Interviews will be held early March (exact dates to be determined). This is NOT a full-time position.

Note: When you apply for this job online, you will be required to answer the following questions:

1. Yes/No: I have local housing available in or near Flushing.

2. Yes/No: I have previous photography experience.

3. Yes/No: I am able to work at least 75% of games during each homestand.

4. Yes/No: I am available to work nights.

5. Yes/No: I am available to work weekends.

Apply for this position | Go back job listings

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Sales & Marketing: Client Relations/Customer Service

New York Mets Pepsi Party Patrol - New York Mets (Flushing, NY)

Job Description:

The New York Mets Pepsi Party Patrol is a high-energy, fan-interactive team that will perform at all 2010 New York Mets home games at Citi Field. The fan-friendly Pepsi Party Patrol will be a quintessential part of the Mets game day experience as members will act as Mets fan ambassadors. Members will be the face of the fan experience. Pepsi Party Patrol duties will include: fan interaction (meet and greets, autograph sessions, etc.), escorting Mr. Met throughout the Ballpark and to his special appearances, T-shirt launches and crowd rallies, facilitating entertainment with live, on-screen interactive features, game operations responsibilities such as selecting feature participants and in-game promotions, and other duties as assigned by the New York Mets.

Qualifications:

• Candidates must have stellar communication and interpersonal skills as well as a positive, energetic personality. The ability to learn quickly and adapt to the situation is essential
• Candidates must be reliable, punctual and courteous. Must have good listening skills and an ability to work with others as a part of a team, as well as the ability to carry their individual responsibilities
• Candidates must be able to dedicate a large percentage of time to the Pepsi Party Patrol, including all designated games, community events and special appearances.
• Must have a flexible schedule for nights, weekends and holidays during the baseball season with mandatory hours from 5pm – end of game for night games and 11am – end of game for afternoon games
• Candidates must work well and have the patience to work with children and feel comfortable working large crowds
• Candidates must have reliable transportation to and from the ballpark
• Need to have an accurate knowledge of the ballpark’s layout
• Candidates should have knowledge of the game of baseball
• Candidates must have a healthy fitness level and be able to be on their feet for the game’s duration while performing their duties during the summer heat
• Proficiency in other languages is valued, but not required
• 18+ and a high school graduate by April 5, 2010 (valid photo I.D. required)
• Please provide current resume and headshot

Apply for this position | Go back job listings

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Sales & Marketing: Client Relations/Customer Service

New York Mets Fan Fest Staff - New York Mets (Flushing, NY)

Job Description:

The New York Mets Fan Fest is a high-energy, fan-interactive area that will be open from 3 hours prior to game time until the 7th inning at all 2010 New York Mets home games at Citi Field. The fan-friendly Fan Fest staff will be a quintessential part of the Mets game day experience as members will act as Mets fan ambassadors. Members will be the face of the fan experience. Fan Fest Staff duties will include: fan interaction (meet and greets, autograph sessions, etc.), responsible for facilitating interactive areas (pitching machine, wiffle ball field, video game kiosk, etc.), assist the live DJ and interactive stage show, provide game operations assistance with live player talk-backs, and other duties as assigned by the New York Mets.

Qualifications:

• Candidates must have stellar communication and interpersonal skills as well as a positive, energetic personality. The ability to learn quickly and adapt to the situation is essential.
• Candidates must be reliable, punctual and courteous. Must have good listening skills and an ability to work with others as a part of a team, as well as the ability to carry their individual responsibilities
• Candidates must be able to dedicate a large percentage of time to the Fan Fest, including all designated games. Must have a flexible schedule for nights, weekends and holidays during the baseball season with a 3:30pm call time for night games and a 9:30am call time for afternoon games
• Candidates must work well and have the patience to work with children and feel comfortable working large crowds
• Candidates must have reliable transportation to and from the ballpark
• Candidates must have a healthy fitness level and be able to be on their feet for the entirety of Fan Fest’s operating hours, especially during the summer heat
• Candidates should have knowledge of the game of baseball
• Proficiency in other languages is valued, but not required
• 18+ and a high school graduate by April 5, 2010 (valid photo I.D. required)
• Please provide current resume and headshot

Apply for this position | Go back job listings

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Internships: Any Internship

Internship Notification - MLB and its Teams (Various Locations, NA)

From time to time, the participating teams in MLB will be looking for interns. If you apply below and check off all of the internship notifications, you will be contacted about specific internship opportunities with these teams posting their internships on the MLB Teams Employment Site. This is a notification only, not an application for a job. Thank you. If you complete your application and then press "edit your information" you can be notified of full-time positions as well. Please complete the application first and then modify it to include notifications for full-time positions if you are in your final year of college or graduate school.

Apply for this position | Go back job listings

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Apply for Future Notification Only: Open

Future Notification Only - MLB and its Teams (Various Locations, NA)

If you would like to be notified of positions in the future with MLB teams participating in this program, please press "apply" below and fill out the entire application. Make sure your email is correct and you check off the notification boxes, otherwise we cannot send you notifications. Once you receive notification of a job, you must come back to the site to reapply. Entering your record here does not make you an applicant to any position and is not viewable by any team. If you need to update, edit, modify or delete your record, please go to "Edit Your Information" above and put in your email address and password.

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Celebrity Mets Fans

Isn't it interesting how many celebrities are Mets fans? It seems as if each game we see someone unexpected at the game in a Mets hat and say "he's a Mets fan?"

While this list is far from complete, it's pretty good, and your additions are appreciated.

Actors/Comedians:

Adam Sandler
Robert DeNiro
Jerry Seinfeld
Ben Stiller
Chris Rock
Jimmy Kimmel
Jon Stewart
Ray Romano
Matthew Broderick
Philip Seymour Hoffman
Viggo Mortensen
Tim Robbins
Susan Sarandon
Jason Alexander
Glenn Close
Kevin James
Jim Breuer
Charles Grodin
Julia Stiles
Matt Dillon
Kevin Dillon
Hilary Swank
John Leguizamo
Nell Carter
Jerry Orbach (RIP)
George Carlin (RIP)
Nell Carter
Ed Burns
Michael Vartan (Alias, One Hour Photo)
Stephen Collins (7th Heaven)
Bradley Whitford (West Wing, Billy Madison)
Hank Azaria
Ellen Barkin
Kamal Ahmed (Jerky Boys)

Music:

Julian Casablancas (The Strokes)
Lars Ullrich (Metallica)
Luther Vandross (RIP)
Twisted Sister
Chuck D
Nas
DJ Clue
Adam Horowitz (Beastie Boys)
George Thorogood
Cyndi Lauper
JoJo Hermann (Widespread Panic)
Robert Randolph
Pearl Bailey (late jazz singer)
Yo La Tengo
Ian Hunter
Marc Anthony
Brian Setzer

TV/Radio Personalities:

Stephen Colbert
Bill O'Reilly
Kelly Ripa
John Oliver (Daily Show)
Howard Stern/Robin Quivers/Gary Dell'Abate
Opie
Linda Cohn
Steve Somers
Joe Benigno
Sid Rosenberg
Mike Breen
Gary Cohen
Howie Rose
Richard Neer
Ian Eagle
Gene Shalit

Authors:

Harper Lee
Paul Auster
P.G. Wodehouse
Peter David

Politics:

George Bush, Sr
Richard Nixon
David Paterson
Chief Justice Earl Warren
Joe Klein
Carol Bellamy
Anthony Weiner

Sports World (claimed to root for the Mets in their formative years):

David Wright
Paul LoDuca
Willie Randolph
Al Leiter
John Franco
Doug Mientkiewicz
Alex Rodriguez
Gary Sheffield
JC Romero
Lee Mazzilli
Bobby Bonilla
Bobby Valentine
Steve Karsay
Rich Aurilia
Jon Daniels (Texas Rangers GM)
Stuart Sternberg (Rays principal owner)
Jeff Van Gundy
Chris Mullin
Tom Gugliotta
Tim Thomas
Ron Artest
Boomer Esiason
Dwight Freeney
Dallas Clark
Keith Bulluck
Gary Bettman (NHL commish)
John McEnroe
James Blake
Sarah Hughes (figure skater)
Mick Foley (WWE)

Steve Phillips Post Sex Rehab Interview

I just finished watching Steve Phillips first interview after sex rehab on the Today Show with Matt Lauer.

Phillips was treated at the same sex clinic that Tiger Woods is (or was) in.

A few things:

• It was a 45 day program
• His wife was there for a week during "Spouse Week"
• Phillips claimed that the clinic was full of "broken people"
• When given the chance to pass a message to Brooke Hundley (the young lady he was involved with), Phillips passed, claiming it would be "inappropriate"
  

During the interview he kept comparing his sex addiction to alcoholism, gambling addiction, drugs, etc. and inferred that in each addiction, the addict was trying to fill a hole (yes, he actually said that, which caused me to burst out laughing).

I am something of a body language, eye movement, and verbal clue expert from my days in the military.

Here are a few thoughts:

• Phillips is incredibly angry at Brooke Hundley and still blames her (here is a link to a previous interview she did)
• Phillips was asked if he and his wife are making it work, and his answer told us all we needed to know--they are trying and failing right now
• Phillips will do this again--he is not cured

All in all a good interview with a fair amount of verbal deception by Phillips--I don't feel one ounce of pity for him, and he wants a lot of pity right now.

Do You Want to Work for the Mets?

Well, you can.

The Mets are looking for photographers...ya know, the guys and gals that walk around during the game taking fan photos.

The best part? Minimal experience is required. Click here for the link to the job described below, or click at the bottom of the page to apply.

Internet/New Media: Photography

NEW YORK METS FAN PHOTOS STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS - New York Mets (New York, NY)

Where: Citi Field, Flushing NY
When: New York Mets home games: April 5th – October 3rd, 2010
Salary: $10.00/hr with bonus opportunities

Amazin’ Fan Photo staff photographers take photos of fans during games and events, which are then made available via mets.com for purchase.

Games-There are 12-15 photographers working every Mets home game. You are not required to work every game but we do request that you are available to work 75% of games during each homestand (to clarify, a homestand is the number of games played at home, back to back, and can range between 6 and 10 games). Each photographer has a specific section of the park during pre-game and in-game. We require our photographers to be here 2 hours prior to game time to shoot the pre-game crowds. We usually shoot until the 7th inning, after which you are free to watch the rest of the game in the standing room only sections. Shifts are approximately 3.5-5 hours long and you are on your feet moving around the stadium and interacting with fans the entire time.

General-We provide shirts and all digital SLR camera equipment. All you need is to bring is yourself and an outgoing, positive attitude. Although we do not require previous photography experience, it is preferred along with an interest in the field of photography. We are looking for enthusiastic, reliable, social people who have basic camera knowledge.

If this seems like a good fit for you please apply online. Interviews will be held early March (exact dates to be determined). This is NOT a full-time position.

Note: When you apply for this job online, you will be required to answer the following questions:

1. Yes/No: I have local housing available in or near Flushing.
2. Yes/No: I have previous photography experience.
3. Yes/No: I am able to work at least 75% of games during each homestand.
4. Yes/No: I am available to work nights.
5. Yes/No: I am available to work weekends.

Apply for this position | Go back job listings